4 weeks of Joy and dirty diapers

Things I've learned in the past 4 weeks...

1. Up All Night has a brand new meaning.
Remember the days of pulling all nighters with your friends? Well, you only thought they were over, only now you are alone at 3 am with a crying baby and a bottle. Your night no longer consists of bars, beer & the inevitable next day hangover. Now, they are made up of dirty diapers, spit up, crying and absolutely, NO sleep!

2. Breastfeeding is for the birds
Kam's Mama said it best, "my body knew I wasn't a milk cow". I tried folks, I did, but sore boobies from a stubborn baby led to hooking up to the super sucker 5000 every few hours and that gets OLD. Plus, my girls did good for a few weeks and then dried up faster than the Brazos after a rain.  So Kye is now a formula baby. Yes, I hear the shrieks of disapproval nation-wide, but here's a term for all you haters - -SUCK IT! ;)

3. The Case of the Never Ending Dirty Diaper
Babies poop - a lot. They poop in their diaper, in the bath, on the towel you wrap them in after their bath and when the diaper leaks they poop on their back, their leg, their onesie and the couch pillow your husband so creatively uses as a prop for his amazingly weak arm that can move mountains, but can't hold up a 7 1/2 lb baby for longer than 5 minutes without support.  Anyway, babies poop. If you're pregnant, I hope you already started buying diapers in advance. It's well worth it, for sure. And remind your husband that boppy pillows have covers that can be thrown in the washer, unlike your couch pillows.

4. How to Manage Grocery Shopping
Go early when it's not crowded. Buy only what's necessary because the baby's enormous car seat doesn't hook correctly to the new grocery carts in United and you have to set them down in the basket. Meaning you have to pack groceries around the car seat and under the basket and it forces you to decide what you really need and what seems frivolous at that moment. Last time, hamburger meat seemed frivolous, but a package of Chips A'hoy made the cut. See, it's really important to delegate the space properly...heck, last time I went, Kye toted the bread for me, he's a helpful little feller!

5. Formula Shmormula
The crap stinks. It makes stinky burps, stinky toots, stinky poops and horrid spit up. Spit up. Eww. Projectile spit up...double eww.  Burp cloths are my best friends. Just sayin'.

6. Hormones are Hell
Lifetime movies are not your friend. Crying babies make your boobs leak and your mind go into a spin cycle. Your husband thinks your insane and is quick to admit that he only thought your pregnancy was rough. When you're sleep deprived, your baby won't stop screaming and go to sleep and your husband's sound asleep...you'll know what I mean.

7. I have never...
been so exhausted, so happy, so in love or so fulfilled in my entire life. I am unemployed for the first time since I was in high school, I'm adjusting to being at home all the time, I'm adjusting to motherhood. It's hard. It's scary. It's exhausting. It's hard on the nerves, the body, the mind, the pocket book...but at 3 am when those little hands wrap around your finger and those big blue eyes look up at you full of wonderment and love, all the bad disappears and all you can feel, all you see is love.

Life is good folks. Craziness & all. :)

Peace, Love & Crazy Momma's,

W